


Just a thought

by PioBoxy



Category: SECHSKIES (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-24
Updated: 2018-11-24
Packaged: 2019-08-28 11:00:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 838
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16722078
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PioBoxy/pseuds/PioBoxy
Summary: Jaeduck doesn't feel young.





	Just a thought

Jaeduck sat with Suwon on the couch. It was a quiet Sunday evening and both were content for the rare opportunity to just sit and unwind.

As Suwon flipped through the t.v. channels, Jaeduck pulled out his phone to check his IG. 

Scrolling through the comments, he felt slightly ashamed to see so many fans continue to call him cute or admit they had initially thought he was the maknea. 

At first had been surprised at the reactions but after a few months he began to feel a bit weird about the situation. He was old afterall, almost 40. 

But when he had voiced his surprise to his caring leader, Jiwon had just snorted.

"Jaeduck," he had said completely unimpressed, "what did you expect? You look too soft. Always have."

"But what about Sunghoon?" he protested. Doesn't everyone always say he hasn't aged at all? - we even agreed so as well. So why am I mistaken as the youngest?" he asked a bit exasperated. 

Jiwon crossed his arms, "Oh sure, Sunghoon looks like he hasn't aged but he doesn't look like a kid. Not like you do." 

At that moment Jiwon's phone had rang. Looking at the caller ID, Jiwon had sighed. He turned to Jaeduck, "And to be fair, your watery eyes and soft personality don't help," he had told him before leaving the room to answer the call.

Jaeduck had frowned at Jiwon's blunt response. Had even stared into the mirror hours later, trying to see what Jiwon saw. But no matter how long he looked, he failed to see the softness Jiwon mentioned. Instead, he saw how worn down he had become. Noticed how his cheeks were slightly hollow in places, and the tired look in his eyes. 

He didn't look young he concluded. Definitely not. He didn't feel young either. Afterall each morning his body ached as he got out of bed. Each new ache reminding him of the years that had passed.

But nothing reminded him of his age more then all the times Tony and him reminisced about the past. Sitting together as they drank, the stories of their group days always came up. 

Between laughs they shared their wildest stories, fondly recalling every interesting or terrifying fan interaction. They teared up as they relived every hardship they had faced, only to laugh again at the ridiculous rivalry between their respective groups. 

But as much as Jaeduck enjoyed talking to Tony about the past, the memories always made him feel like the years had gone by too fast. Making his precious memories feel almost unreal, as if he had been dreaming.

And so whenever he went on variety shows and was compared to the younger idols, or was asked if there were any caught his attention, Jaeduck felt unbearably old. Unimaginably so whenever some of these young idols actually bowed at him. Their heads dropping low as he passed by, eyes glinting with a kind of respect Jaeduck felt he didn't deserve. 

Yet none of that ever seemed to matter when he was with Suwon.

With Suwon, time seemed to have stopped. And the weight of the past, his mistakes and responsibilities disappeared. For Suwon still looked at him with the same loving gaze as years ago, his smiles holding the same unwavering sweetness. 

With Suwon, Jaeduck felt so young and clumsy. Felt like he was just learning to love, nervously trying to impress his first crush. His heart constantly feeling close to bursting whenever Suwon smiled at him, eyes shining brightly for him.

And why wouldn't he feel this way? 

How couldn't he when they still clug to each other with the same playfulness. When they laughed at their secret jokes. Spent time sitting across from each other in small niche bars, sharing drinks between endless rounds of flirty glances and sweet smiles. And then like teenagers, still hid behind corners at concert venues, sneaking a few kisses and sensual touches between set changes.

 

Jaeduck suddenly felt his heart swell at the thought. He turned to look at Suwon and smiled.

Suwon was engrossed in a movie he had found, one hand still holding the remote control and his eyebrows furrowed in concentration. 

Jaeduck set his phone down and scooted over a bit, snuggling into Suwon's side. Suwon's eyes didn't leave the screen as he threw an arm over him, resting his fingers on Jaeduck's shoulder. 

"Jagi?" Jaeduck murmured.

"Hmmn?"

"I love you."

Suwon turned off the t.v. and looked at him with smile.

"Is that so?" he asked with a glint in his eyes. "Why do you say it so softly though? Don't you love me?" he asked with a slight pout. 

Jaeduck laughed and wrapped an arm around Suwon's neck. "How should I say it then?"

Suwon looked thoughtful for a moment. And then smiled, slowly sliding his hand down to Jaeduck's waist. 

"I have a couple of ideas" 

Jaeduck sat up then. "Oh?" 

But Suwon only smiled wider as he pushed Jaeduck gently into the couch

**Author's Note:**

> One day I'll write smut, but for now I'll just stick to my half baked efforts.


End file.
